So Adam’s son Jerome has had an ear infection for six months now. Adam has taken Jerome to many doctors that have many different drugs to test on Jerome… like he was their personal little human guinea pig.

Poor Jerome has been taking antibiotics for such a long time that his little digestive system has gone nuts and he’s been pooping squirrels for two weeks.

Adam had enough and took Jerome off the drugs! Adam began searching like crazy for any kind of cure he could find…

1. They tried voodoo ice cream chicken hearts.
2. Amish Asian fusion mashed potatoes and sushi.
3. Chuck Norris tears(They’re hard to get).

Nothing seemed to work… Until Adam saw an old episode of “The A-Team” last week where believe it or not Mr.T had an ear infection… Hannibal cured with it garlic oil! Adam looked it up and it proved true online so they tried it… and it WORKED! Jerome is cured. A few drops of garlic oil in the ears every night for a week and all is now well!
So it’s official, Garlic oil cures ear infections and the A-Team is still saving the day!

Have you ever stolen anything when you were a kid… Candy, a video game, or a CD player?

Well when Adam was just eight he learned the hard way. Adam and his buddy were in a big department store just being kids when his friend thought it would be fun to steal a CD player; to kids stealing is like going fishing…You don’t need to, but it’s just fun to hang out with your friends, talk loud, pee in the water, and drink until you vomit.

So the run down was Adam’s friend stuffing a CD player down his pants then proceeding to walk out of the store, the only problem here was that Adam didn’t know his friend took anything! As Adam and his friend were making their way out of the store they noticed a lot of people dressed in suits walking in the same direction as them but Adam didn’t realize they were security since he didn’t do anything wrong and his friend didn’t share with him that he was playing a CDs in pants. So when Adam and his friend got to the door they got a face full of well aged blackend gum soiled into the cold wet floor.

The police called Adam’s and his friend’s dad. Adam’s father was pissed to say the least! Dad said, “If I ever get a phone call like that again I won’t pick you up and you’re grounded for a month!”, Adam’s friend’s dad told him kids will be kids. Adam didn’t even do anything yet he got in more trouble than his friend.

Poor Adam trouble seemed to be following him since he was just a kid!

So the equation is “Chocolate + Soda” = Violent vomiting and blindness!

Poor Adam,
Adam doesn’t mix well with certain foods and drinks. Adam told us a story today about one of his first dates with his wife when they were kids; it didn’t start well. Adam and his wife just stopped at a gas station and were in need of cool beverages; his wife got a Fresca and Adam got a Yoo-hoo. Yoo-hoo was one of Adam’s favorite drinks, WAS!
Adam took a few sips and almost instantly started having violent reactions, vomiting, shaking, poo leakage, and temporary blindness! Glad it wasn’t my car!

What the F was in that Yoo-hoo? Nothing but Yoo-hoo, Adam’s body decided then and there that it wasn’t having Yoo-hoo ever again.

Quick fact: it looks the same going out as in

Adam told us another story today from his youth. When Adam was a kid he used to go to the boys and girls club like a lot of other kids, but Adam didn’t care for the structured activities… Like interacting with the sub humans and shuffle board… Adam was born an old soul and the children’s games were just that to Adam.

When Adam got a little bigger he told his mom that he wasn’t going anymore! So Adam’s mom brought him to work with her one day after school to hang out with her co-workers, the co- workers asked Adam if he ever played Checkers; Adam had never played Checkers so they thought they’d teach him. Like most kids that learned how to play Checkers you’d have your grandfather let you win all the games and encourage you, this didn’t happen at Adam’s mom’s work!

They co-workers of Adam’s mom keeped beating Adam over and over again, never letting him win and always shouting King Me!!! Adam wanted to stop playing but they wouldn’t let him stop… Three hours of shouting from 10 co-workers… King Me! King Me! Maybe this is why he’s always crying?

Adam told me about this time in high school when he has hanging out with some friends when he felt the need to aerate his poo hole. The need was great and the desire to entertain his fellow man was even greater. Adam squeezed with a great might and pushed out a loud oderiferous ass gas. Adam said, ” Here it comes”.. then the pain! Adam tore the skin in his butt!!! The pain lasted two weeks he said.

Don’t try this at home!
Remember… Hold it in boys and girls!